Wednesday, May 19, 2010

They judge me before they even know me.

Every one is different. Some people make friends quickly, some take a few months, and some take years. I would place myself in the last category. It takes me a very long time to warm up to a person. I think that is the reason I don't have a lot of friends. I particularly do not have such a desire, either. I am happy being within the tiny circle that I have had for years. And if my friends are not around, which has been the case for a few years now, I do not feel bad. I am content, and happy.

The time when I feel bad is when I think that I can allow more people into my life and they jump to conclusions as to what type of person I am and end things abruptly.

Today, I had a conversation with a person for the first time that lasted for not more than a minute. And, the conclusion about me was something like....You are the type who has no place for someone new in your life, and, you have no desire either. I hope you have a good life with you and you alone. Good Luck!

I was surprised by this conclusion, because I had no where in the conversation indicated anything like this. I was asked what I was doing. To which, I replied that I was spending the evening with I, me, and myself (it was said as a joke, anyway). I do not know how having said that one could have such an impression.

It was very evident from the conversation that this person will not spend time in knowing me and will be quick to jump to conclusions (It could be that even I am jumping to a conclusion). But, after all that person said to me, I didn't feel like giving any explanation. I just said that you are right and kept quite.

Finding quick answers to friendships and relations is beyond me. I like to spend time with people I like. I observe them, not because I have to find faults, but, to know them more, and so that their personality becomes familiar and sinks in. All this makes me more comfortable in their presence. It would be nice if people hae the same approach with me. Slow, and steady. It also shows that the person has a interest.

I guess even I have drawn a conclusion and also given an explanation. Maybe, we are not different, afterall. Hmmm...


Law said...

hey madhu i am glad!... u blogged, waiting slowly and steadily to know more abt u!

Maddie said...

Thanks for stopping by, Lawrence :).

Manusmriti said...

Something very deep that you said. Of all these years of friendship and working together with you, I sometimes feel surprised in the earlier years why you are not very much like the other people around. But I should admit, that's what makes you stand out from a crowd. And that is definitely one of the reasons that I am still in constant touch with you, and now have this great opportunity to comment on your blog. Be the way you are, and enjoy being so! :)

Maddie said...

Thanks Manu :) The friends that I made during RMSI days are still with me, and that is a blessing :). I know I can count on you at any point in life. You always had the right thing to say at all times.